Saturday, July 07, 2007

Weekends suck, at the moment 

How in the hell do you entertain 7 teenage boys that have no motivation. it's a fuckin fight to try and get them to do anything. they totally need to get out and do something, but they just sit around. it will come around. lifestyle change is big. mondays now are my favorite days - it's like saturday - until about 4pm. anyway, i know i'm bitchin and what not. i know this job will get better - it has to. there are times (like right now) where i need to start consequating kids and i just don't have the energy at the moment, cuz i know he will start going down the road of non-compliance......grumble. it's all good, though, as these guys need that structure. also, i can't let shit slide, or i'll be fucked in a couple of months. having said that, i'm out.

Saturday, June 23, 2007

what a whirlwind 

it's been three months and three days since we've been living in omaha, ne. feels like longer. E and I live in a 3-4,000 sq. ft. house with my family (wife and two kids) and seven boys. All deviants of somekind. We are to establish a traditional family model and then raise these boys in it. what a trip. at the moment, i'm having feelings of extreme inadequacy. they seem to come in waves. E and I, as a husband and wife, are very non-traditional. we are both strong authority figures - not one of us has greater authority than the other. so, i need to take a more leading role in the house? weird for me. i do understand the philosophy, though. most of the boys in our house come from a more traditional style home where the man is the head of the household - yada, yada, yada - you all know the drill......anyway. it's the day after i started writing this. today has been going pretty good. been having a lot of teaching opportunities with the boys. here's how a typical teaching interaction goes. i tell a kid to go put the garbage out. the "Cirriculum Skill/Objective" is "Following Instructions". There are four steps in Boys' Town to "Following Instructions";
1) Look at the person
2) Say Okay
3) Do the task right away
4) Check back/see if there's anything else you can do

If the Boys' Town youth (from here on out i will refer to the Boys' Town youth as "youth" or "youths" - unless there are extenuating circumstances that require more description. Like, "He was such a dumbass today", etc. - anyway, you get the picture.) misses one of those steps, they will earn a negative consequence. If they do all of the setps perfectly they earn positive consequences that go on a daily point card, alright, i don't want to talk to this anymore. it's basically a very complicated version of "pavlov's dog" - reward the good behavior, punish the bad behavior. immediately - no dialogue, etc. my boss says i'm to nice. yep. i am. oh well. last night was a bit more rough than today. sometimes i dread getting into work mode but, when i actually get to interacting with the youth, all trepedation goes away. this is such a technical blog, whatever. now you all know what i'm talking about - sort of.

kids are doin good. my time with them has been limited, but it's getting better. i've been spendin some good time with my aunt on my mom's side. she is very giving and caring. actually, my mom and dad's families, that live here in omaha, have been very supportive to us. we get two days off a week (till 11pm) and we don't really have anywhere to go except expensive restaraunts or a movie or something where we have to spend money and i don't like doin that all the time. so, mad love to my aunts and uncles, yo, as we say here in the hood. please send me e-mails with questions, etc. post some excitement - or excrement - whatever works for you.


Tuesday, January 30, 2007

A thought 

i've have been walking in the opposite direction of my upbringing religously speaking now for about five or six years. can't remember. it's been lately (past two years or so) where i have become increasingly DEEPLY bitter towards the whole idea of religion - period. running in tandem with this thought process is my lifestyle. 8-5 corporate job, life insurance, health insurance, video games, cars, stocks, trying to make more money, supervisor, drinking on the weekends, seeing movies and watching tv in my spare time, barely any reading, listening to music only on the radio - where am i going with this? is there a connection between my current lifestyle and my dependance upon (i cringe when i say this cliche) god?......more later. still packing.......

Thursday, January 25, 2007

Changes - Nervous? 

E and I just got jobs at Girls and Boys Town in Omaha, Ne. We will be leaving at the end of February for Omaha. I don't know what to think at the moment........

i'm elated that i don't have to work at ventana any more. i'm elated that i can work with troubled youth. i'm nervous about doing this as a family.......

also, update with the smoking - i have been smoke free since my last post. excellent.

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Trying to Quit Smoking (Days 1 and 2) 

Right now, i'm fucking craving a cigarette.

anyway, i decided to quit smoking. no real motivator - just like a mental switch was finally flipped off.

anyway, yesterday (day 1) was a battle. i had four cigarettes. i remember driving to work and noticing that the packs of cigarettes in my car were empty, so i decided to quit. very depressing day, yesterday was. fedex dave said, "nothing is funny to drew, right now". made me laugh. anyway, he just recently quit smoking, so he had some good advice. yesterday i was in a fog. i have no idea why - i think i was withdrawing from lack of nicotine in my system. that was fucked up. i couldn't think straight, i was grumpy towards my kids, unbelievably depressed, etc. i think the one thing that kept me going on dirts so long was the fact that i didn't want to have to quit something. i should be able to do whatever i want, right? i guess part of growing up is knowing when to quit.......anyway, that contributed to my depression.

today, day 2, feeling a bit better. like i said, right now i want a cigarette, but i'm going to type this instead and go to bed. i was hyper all day - had a good day. pretty with it. thanx to bryan for hanging with me during my work breaks and lunch break. went to starbucks today and sat outside, in my usual spot - outside. there was a guy smoking at the next table over. i saw him smoking, the smoke was blowing in my face, and i felt nothing. i had no craving, and i wasn't repulsed, either - just nothing. weird. here's the kicker - i'm trying to watch my weight at the same time - no easy task. i haven't had to many bad food cravings yet. i can't gain anymore weight. fedex dave came over today and asked how i was doing. i said i'm smoke free at the moment - feel like i'm in a 12 step. he said that it takes three days for the nicotine to get out of my system, and then it's all a mental battle from there. great. we'll see how that goes. anyway, i'm out for now. i'm going to go to bed.

Thursday, February 16, 2006

Update, of sorts 

It's 3:30am. feeling kind of disconnected.......i've just spent the passed half hour trying to find friends on the internet from my highschool dayz in omaha. what's that all about? i know i'm gonna be tired tomorrow.......what ever.

still a manager (receiving now)
still have a spouse (love to e)
still have kids (two only)
still have two dogs
still have two cars
still have two balls.....BUT....i just had a vasectomy done. november. if anybody reads this at all and is thinking about getting a vasectomy WEAR A JOCK STRAP TO AND FROM THE SURGERY!!!!!!!

That's all i'll say about that. Interesting thought that i had the other night about management/leading/being a team lead. mostly mexicans work for me. they can't stand to do individual tasks.....drives them up the wall. they'd rather be working together - commentary on community. here's the question, then, how does one manage that? if i were to be managing to cater 100% to mexican culture, we'd have to have double what we think we need? weird and interesting. i do need to sleep. what an inconvenience. wish our bodies weren't dependant on sleep.

oh well. peace out to my maybe one reader?

Monday, September 19, 2005

Words of Warning......... 

After Orlando, Florida, city officials voted in 1998 to fly rainbow flags from city lampposts during the annual Gay Days event at Disney World, Robertson issued the city a warning: "I don't think I'd be waving those flags in God's face if I were you. ... [A] condition like this will bring about the destruction of your nation. It'll bring about terrorist bombs, it'll bring earthquakes, tornadoes and possibly a meteor."

–Pat Robertson

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?